Das passt mir gar nicht in den Kram.

[details=“English Translation”]That’s the last thing I want.[/details] How does “Kram” function here?

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The kernel of the expression is

“Das passt mir (gar) nicht” literally “That does not fit for me (at all)” or maybe better “That’s not okay with me”.

The given translation here is a little bit far off for my taste.

“Kram” is an old word for “junk” or “trifles”. A “Krämer” is an oldfashioned “peddler” or small shopkeeper.
In various spellings (Kramer, Cremer …) it is a very common surname.

Here it is just a fixed saying and it adds nothing to the meaning.

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“nicht in den Kram passen” is a phrase that expresses that something is against your plans or schedule. It literally translates to “does not fit into my stuff”.

The imagery is such that you’re surrounded by things/stuff (“Kram”) that you’re extremely busy with, or that is meticulously organised, and now some new thing comes along, and you don’t know where to put it, because you have no space for it, or it doesn’t agree with your system of arranging things.

dict.cc even has the whole phrase:
Das passt mir nicht in den Kram. - That doesn’t suit my plans.

A related phase is:
Das hat mir gerade noch gefehlt. - That’s just what I needed. (meant in an ironic way)

So all in all, I think it’s not too bad of a translation for the english sentence.

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